Ouarzazate, Morroco

To Venus

I've been trying to think how to write about you
but still couldn't find words to describe
My heart took over my head and i cant think straight
when you hear me crying just smile


We could walk in circles again
You will hide your beauty behind me and
when around is desert we could make it rain


You can help me solve this puzzle of mine
i ask the birds to tell you
you can talk to me with someone else's voice
i hold your hand through a different person
but i know its you because i feel your heart warm

everyone would say we went crazy
and we will eat delicate Moroccan pistachio candy
like we would we could create another places
you dont need to tell me
you are coming as if i knew you. You stand right there and shine on me
like the brightest star in the sky
my heart is blind but i can see through the dark
so I can fly as high to reach where you are.
Blink on me again so we can go to sleep
Together.

As Ilhas Afortunadas

"Que voz vem no som das ondas
Que não é a voz do mar?
E a voz de alguém que nos fala,
Mas que, se escutarmos, cala,
Por ter havido escutar.

E só se, meio dormindo,
Sem saber de ouvir ouvimos
Que ela nos diz a esperança
A que, como uma criança
Dormente, a dormir sorrimos.

São ilhas afortunadas
São terras sem ter lugar,
Onde o Rei mora esperando.
Mas, se vamos despertando
Cala a voz, e há só o mar."

Fernando Pessoa

Energy of the Week - Vayishlach

notes from Zohar Class with Michael Berg

Consciousness is everything
To draw the work spiritual giants had already done is necessary to go back to the stories and connect to it.
What inspires us this week?
Reading from the statement by Rav Ashlag "Out of 1000 people who are in a spiritual path only 1 complete it"
We need to push ourselves to create the desire to complete it. Kabbalah needs to be what drive us to completion.

After Jacob ran away from his house to find his soul mate at the house of the most evil man at that time, Lavan, and goes back to meet his brother Esav. Its a fight between two forces Jacob= light x Esav= desire to receive for the self alone. We need assistance to win this battle ourselves
the Creator sent Jacob his angels to protect him in all of his ways.

How do we achieve this protection? We need the support of the light.

The Creator sent Jacob many angels. No one can achieve his goals alone, we need supernal assistance. Angels= different energies that protect a person. Jacob became protected thought his spiritual work, the angels came to him.

When the Shrimah (god's female energy) came to rest in Jacob that's when angels came to him to protect him in his battle. Angels cannot come on their own. we cant have protection without the angels. You need to have Shrimah first.

How do we bring Shrimah?
- Through transformation and restriction. Every selfish, anger action let Shrimah leave us, and the angels leave with her. Every action of restriction (going against your nature) draws angels. It's impossible to bring sustenance and protection without the work. When we get angry we force Shrimah to leave us and angels leave with her. The only way to have it is through our daily work.

Extra actions of sharing and restriction draws Shrimah and angels strongly.

"For its angels he command to you" When Jacob comes to meet Esav.
"There are more forces of angels in us than in them" We need to be aware of their existence so they can support us. The knowledge gives you the assistance of a stronger protection.

"Better to be low and have him (negative side) as a servant than to have honor and respect and have no connection to the creator"

The negative side constantly wants to pull us down. Sadness=disconnection.

To the extent you push your ego down you can control the forces of darkness, to have dominion over the negative side. When you find ways to diminish your ego, if you do that constantly you can control the forces of darkness. Negative side cannot have any force upon us. If we allow our ego to raise the negative side takes control over us.

"Better to be low and have him (negative side) as a servant than to have honor and respect and have no connection to the creator"

The only way that anyone can be 1 in 1000 is if everyday you think you are lower than them. Desire to achieve this level. Why Jacob had angels giving gifts to Esav? To grow Esav's ego. At the end of the battle Esav's ego was so big that his life force went away and he only hugged Jacob and kissed him.

When you constantly push your ego down it becomes your servant.

After the battle Jacob was left alone. Jacob was coming from a very high point of his work and found himself alone. His protection was gone, he had moments of doubt. Why?

EVERY TIME BEFORE A GREAT GROWTH, BEFORE ANY GREAT BLESSING, THE CONSCIOUSNESS NEED TO BE REMOVED. YOU NEED TO KNOW THAT'S PART OF THE PROCESS.
Any time we feel doubt it's a necessary part before a great revelation. Do I give up up or should I push forward?
If you continue to push even when there's doubt it will be much greater. MOMENTS OF DOUBT ARE A GREAT INDICATION WE ARE ABOUT TO RECEIVE A BLESSING. The Creator is telling you get ready, keep pushing. If you give up you will miss the opening. Before any great revelation you are left alone. It's a call, there's an opening coming to you. PUSH GREATER!


Every time you pray, every time you talk, nothing comes to waste. Every word that comes out of our mouth is a spiritual entity and it doesn't come to waste, an energy it's created. Every action also creates this energy to support you.

Jacob saw the angel as a person. Anything that comes to us are angels manifestations of our work, even if it looks dark we are given assistance by the angels.
How can we see the positive angel in a person that says something bad to us? It's a connection we had created before that comes back to us.
How do we interact with our angels - If we see it as a man we are low, if we see it as an angel we need to hug it. If you accept it as an angel and hug him you add this angel to your army. Do I see him as an angel coming to help me? If yes, he joins your army. See external people as angels and we hug them we elevate ourselves to complete our connection.

"As the statues indicate, she impersonated the reproductive powers of men and of animals and of all other life.
She lived in Nature; she was everywhere wherever there was life, the mother of all living things; all offerings of every possible nature were therefore acceptable to her; hence, the vast wealth which poured into her temple."

Civilization by Marco Brambrilla

Vayera

God says to Abraham: Take the only son that you have and bring him to the mountain. I want you to sacrifice your own son.
An angel stopped it and put a ram (?) in the place of Isaac (his son).
But Isaac was not a baby he was 37 years old, why didn't he run away?
It was a test.

MESSAGE OF THE WEEK

Abraham was circumcised when he was 99 years old - circumcision means removing a negative force, layers, that allows the soul to reveal it's potential. After 3 days of his circumcision God was revealed to Abraham, he went to his next level. An elevated consciousness that no man had ever been before, he was enlightened. He was in the midst of feeling pain, he was supposed to be resting inside where it was warm but instead he went to the entrance of his tent looking if anyone would pass by. He didn't want to waste a chance to share. He needed the forces of healing but he abdicated, he wanted to help others. That's the highest level a person can get.
What is the code in this story?

Abraham reached Vayera. He knew a secret. He could not allow himself to stop. 'I've never arrived' 'I've never reached it' - that's what it means to be at the entrance of the tent - 'I want to move!' 'what's next?'

He had a huge desire to welcome guests that he actually manifested guests, 3 angels dressed as men.

He had a huge desire to go to the next level. We can be stuck in being enlightened and we will eventually fall.

'Forget what I've done, I want it all. I dont wanna lose opportunity to help and to go to the next level.'

the problem of our life is that we get in a certain level of fulfillment and we get stuck. We need to be at the entrance.
Enjoy for a second, appreciate and go to the next level. Chasing after the opportunity to give. Abraham knew that without it he would lose everything.

In this world movement brings peace. Resting brings chaos.

The moment I arrive I lose it. Always be at the entrance.

And indication that you are not going to the next level: when you talk too much of past experiences, how amazing are things you've done etc.


Lust, pride, need for recognition and jealousy make a person get out of this world.

"Jealousy among scholars would bring a lot of wisdom"


Pride and Lust
The highest level of self indulgence. If I fill up my void with this pleasures I would be good. If people know how great I am I will feel better. That's a trick of satan he wants to fill us with lust and pride and it will deteriorate us.

AFTER THE ORIGINAL TSIMTSUM THE VESSEL SAID TO THE LIGHT: I LOVE YOU BUT I HAVE TO RESTRICT YOU SO I CAN BE LIKE YOU

There is positive an negative jealousy.

Negative jealousy/envy:

When I envy someone because he or she have more (money, respect, power, education etc) than me. It will never fill me up with anything, pride and lust at least fills with physicality, but jealousy will only make us weak.

Positive jealousy:

Positive jealousy is the only reason we are here on earth. I want to earn the light, that's why I am here. We were jealous of the light and we came down.
Positive pressure. Someone has more than me. Jealousy is desire.

At the moment I give too much power to my klippot (shells) I will drown
If I am purely jealous it has to do with me wanting to improve myself. That's essential.
When you chose to be at the right environment you will find in everybody an attribute to learn from and grow. Always will find things in other people that will emulate me.


The main cause of jealousy is laziness.

When we are lazy we become sad. Satan come and say I need more recognition. Laziness = sadness

Abraham was in constant move. To the extent I love my life God will be there.

When a person chases Chesed (giving) the creator send us a gift: someone that needs help. When a person chases to go to his next level to the extent of certainty and attitude vessels would be revealed to him.
The giver attracts force of mercy around him that creates protection.

if I am not moving to my next level I am disconnecting.


Biding of Issac.

And God tested Abraham. Isaac could run away.
Abraham was right column energy (giving), Isaac was left column energy (receiving)
Abraham lacked judgement. And so he went against his nature putting his son in danger. Totally for the sake of the light he gave up of his personality. It's all about combining forces.

ITS ALL ABOUT COMBINING FORCES

Saying yes to every second is not necessarily the most spiritual thing to do. If I say yes all the time i need to build strength to love in a tough way.
I need to be willing to be judged as a not giving person for the sake of giving.

If it his natural for you to be humble sometimes you need to tell people how important you are.

Balance of forces. go outside yourself so you can find the central column.

Detach from my personality.

if you are very good at something you need to feel as a beginner to find the central column.


notes from class with Eitan Yardeni

Lech Lecha

Lech Lecha

Lech= go away, go outside
Lecha= for you

The first words the creator shared

Abraham, first man to begin the path of transformation, heard from god "go away". He had already left his fathers house and gone away from his country.

"go outside for you, I will show you where. I guide you"

Leave everything behind.

What's the energy of the week?

Lech - going out = go outside limitation of the known, of yesterday

It's not going outside for the sake of changing the world but for your own transformation. Go outside our own negativity. Anything we do to go outside ourselves is the first thing of all that will help us to change, it has to be for your own transformation otherwise is almost impossible to transform someone else. First I need to change me principle number 1.
Leaving the clear is leaving the level below.
When I dwell, connect to what ive done yesterday I lost a level. You need to think about the next level. Think about tomorrow.
Driven by the unknown.
Abraham was waiting for people who would feel him, He knew he needed to leave everything behind and move to the next level. Everyday the light help us and we don't feel embarrassed, when it comes from other people we feel embarrassed: ego

Being helped by the unknown
To go to the unknown

I need to have clarity otherwise im not motivated, that's when I have drive: ego

the light said: 'I want you to be confused'

from one country to another - next level is beyond me, is unknown.
Next spiritual If every time is planned is indication Im not going to the next level.
Place of clarity - indication of limitation

To walk with the light, to expose myself to the unknown.
If it is unknown I don't have good energy - conflict between the ego and the soul

Throught the process of departure of the body we can see things we've never seen before. Do you want to wait for that day? Because that's gonna happen either way, or I go towards it everyday? If I go towards the unknown I have permission. If Im planned I will be blind.

Everybody needs to know the name of their negativity. name=essence. The more I know the essence of my negativity more I can go away. In order to know it I need to risk.
Risky and uncomfortable that's the only way it can be removed.

What does it mean to go outside?
We all have things that determine our personality = Environment, past lifetime, family.

In the time of conception if the dominance force is the father the child will be more energetic if the mother the child would be more lazy
You see the parents intention affect the purity of the thoughts the shell that affects the soul\\With all our limitation I need to break it completely. The goal is to break all limitations in all environment. No limit enviroment in any aspect.

The light can delete everything from your past if you are in Lech Lecha. I know I need to go there. This week.

Every aspect of our DNA can change. What would be the unlimited self potential. Face fears.

Rachel helped people to change Abraham had no fear for the unknown. When im helping anotyehr human being the light that person reveals is a shield that protects me. help a person to enlighten other people, the light he reveals becomes a strengh.

Unknown force beyond laws of cause and effect to allow the unknown force to guide.

Give me power to awaken others as a life mission. To have divine inspiration = help others to help others. The unknown is guiding me. Touching others constantly.

Be guided by it.

1 First discussion Abraham had with the creator.
I need to able to transform all my limiting environment from my life. Family, childhood, negative friends.

Be in the mission of the unknown. Ask the light to go to the next level. Allow other people to be enlightened.

Zohar Portion of the Week - Noach Vol II

From all the 4 for kingdoms - inanimate, vegetable, animal and human - humans are the only with free will. We affect all the other kingdoms.
If we go according to the law we create protection.

The Noach Arch - Protection against the flood

Flood= chaos, hate, economic issues, environmental problems, ego. The flood was caused by all our negativity.
The arch is consciousness of protection in the world of imbalance. The words of the Zohar are he arch of our generation.


Before the flood came (before Abraham) things were very easy to the people. It says that whenever you planted a seed, the seed would give 40 years of plantation.
The seed of all negativity is laziness- the moment I dont grab opportunity to do the right thing. Gradually i will develop ego, i will become a victim.

Noach created the arch in 120 years, he tried to advise the people, but they were too easy and comfortable.

Water is energy of mercy, love. Flood is energy of chaos and destruction. The people were not bad but love can be manifested in different ways, like sex without limitation or idol worshiping.

They were still respectful but the destruction came when they got jealous of each other and started stealing other people. That will cause destruction. Any time we are self absorbed we will hurt other people. Any kind of selfishness will end up hurting others.

How do we build the arch?
Noach didn't see the water, he saw the angel of death. To be in protection i need to be afraid to be connected with the angel of death. If I am not afraid to be surrounded by negativity I will be pulled by this. I will never be able to maintain protection. I can easely be pulled by the forces of chaos.

Noach was busy all day long feeding his animals, constantly busy outside himself.

1 Unity
2 Same mission
3 Know the hebrew letters

When people reach a place of unity and single mission nothing can stop them to accomplish anything.
The Center is a bubble of protection - people with same mission and unity, bigger than my own issues, - that's when im connected with the Noach arch. When the priority is to affect change in the world is one of the main ingredients to be connected with the protection shield. To affect change in the world through unity, with a mission that become my priority.
Desire to shift my consciousness.

In orderto be protected I need to plug in to the energy field.Shift the consciousness that the mission is my priority

Another ingridient: that i can learn from everyone from my environment, I see that everyone can teach me something, help me. Something to contribute with me. Learn from everyone.

Noach was liked by God an than by people. To know that you have the same mission as your environment the indication is that if you are liked. Being liked by the right people is not the main concern. The big concern is to connect with the light, than i will attract people that like me. Do= being busy outside myself for the sake of revealing light.
- run away from my ego

Helping others can be tricky, if when i help other and seek return it came from the ego. We need to help for the sake of connecting with the light. Giving regardeless if they thank you or not.

The light is always there. We need to lean on something - We lean on the light!

I need to run away from my ego. If im not seeing layers of my ego everyday it means im not running away from my ego. More im busy sharing more i can runaway from my ego.

The protection comes when im in the process. Righteous people know they have a lot more to grow.

Why do I help other people? Because is opportunity for me to connect with the light.
The only way to do things with love for a long time is when i know the return is in the light.

Connecting with the light is a trust.

Music Improvisation Party III

music by winslow the third and diana motta

music by Winslow the Third and Diana Motta

Click To Play

"(...) Gosto dos venenos mais lentos, das bebidas mais amargas, das drogas mais poderosas, das idéias mais insanas, dos pensamentos mais complexos, dos sentimentos mais fortes. Tenho um apetite voraz e os delírios mais loucos. Você pode até me empurrar de um penhasco que eu vou dizer:
- E daí? Eu adoro voar!"

pois é Clarice.... tamo junta, vamo que vamo!

Building It

___

NYC STREET DANCE

The Death of Saint Narcissus

'Come under the shadow of this grey rock--
Come in under the shadow of this grey rock,
And I will show you something different from either
Your shadow sprawling over the sand at daybreak, or
Your shadow leaping behind the fire against the red rock:
I will show you his bloody cloth and limbs
And the grey shadow on his lips.
He walked once between the sea and the high cliffs
When the wind made him aware of his limbs smoothly passing each other
And of his arms crossed over his breast.
When he walked over the meadows
He was stifled and soothed by his own rhythm.
By the river
His eyes were aware of the pointed corners of his eyes
And his hands aware of the pointed tips of his fingers.
Struck down by such knowledge
He could not live men's ways, but became a dancer before God.
If he walked in city streets
He seemed to tread on faces, convulsive thighs and knees.
So he came out under the rock.
First he was sure that he had been a tree,
Twisting its branches among each other
And tangling its roots among each other.
Then he knew that he had been a fish
With slippery white belly held tight in his own fingers,
Writhing in his own clutch, his ancient beauty
Caught fast in the pink tips of his new beauty.
Then he had been a young girl
Caught in the woods by a drunken old man
Knowing at the end the taste of his own whiteness,
The horror of his own smoothness, And he felt drunken and old.
So he became a dancer to God,
Because his flesh was in love with the burning arrows
He danced on the hot sand Until the arrows came.
As he embraced them his white skin surrendered itself to the redness of blood, and satisfied him.
Now he is green, dry and stained
With the shadow in his mouth.'


- T. S. Eliot

Eu vim para assitir as boas notícias, nao gaste meu tempo falando sobre o bem e o mal.
Desculpe-me por amar demais - A vida me resta.

Poem I

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your blood tastes like syrup
i drank it all yesterday

i wish i could see above your walls
i would stay quiet and let you say

your voice sounds like thunders
but your tones were like mine

you would stand hard jaw on my shoulder
smile demure pleasure and close your eyes

you seem to dream about lying with flowers
you breathe and whisper away a piece of my soul

my heart does not beat in seconds but hours
i could not fit inside myself with so much of you to love



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Yesterday Moon

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http://www.flickr.com/photos/diana_motta/4833432190/in/set-72157624022243425/

’Stamos em pleno mar
Era um sonho dantesco... o tombadilho,
Que das luzernas avermelha o brilho,
Em sangue a se banhar.
Tinir de ferros... estalar do açoite...
Legiões de homens negros como a noite,
Horrendos a dançar...

Negras mulheres, suspendendo às tetas
Magras crianças, cujas bocas pretas
Rega o sangue das mães:
Outras, moças... mas nuas, espantadas,
No turbilhão de espectros arrastadas,
Em ânsia e mágoa vãs.

E ri-se a orquestra, irônica, estridente...
E da ronda fantástica a serpente
Faz doudas espirais...
Se o velho arqueja... se no chão resvala,
Ouvem-se gritos... o chicote estala.
E voam mais e mais...
Presa dos elos de uma só cadeia,
A multidão faminta cambaleia
E chora e dança ali!

Um de raiva delira, outro enlouquece...
Outro, que de martírios embrutece,
Cantando, geme e ri!

No entanto o capitão manda a manobra
E após, fitando o céu que se desdobra
Tão puro sobre o mar,

Diz do fumo entre os densos nevoeiros:
"Vibrai rijo o chicote, marinheiros!
Fazei-os mais dançar!..."

E ri-se a orquestra irônica, estridente...
E da ronda fantástica a serpente
Faz doudas espirais!
Qual num sonho dantesco as sombras voam...
Gritos, ais, maldições, preces ressoam!
E ri-se Satanaz!...
Senhor Deus dos desgraçados!
Dizei-me vós, Senhor Deus!
Se é loucura... se é verdade
Tanto horror perante os céus...
Ó mar, por que não apagas
Co'a esponja de tuas vagas
De teu manto este borrão?...
Astros! noite! tempestades!
Rolai das imensidades!
Varrei os mares, tufão!...

Quem são estes desgraçados
Que não encontram em vós
Mais que o rir calmo da turba
Que excita a fúria do algoz?
Quem são?... Se a estrela se cala,
Se a vaga à pressa resvala
Como um cúmplice fugaz,
Perante a noite confusa...
Dize-o tu, severa musa,
Musa libérrima, audaz!

São os filhos do deserto
Onde a terra esposa a luz.
Onde voa em campo aberto
A tribo dos homens nus...

São os guerreiros ousados,
Que com os tigres mosqueados
Combatem na solidão...
Homens simples, fortes, bravos...
Hoje míseros escravos
Sem ar, sem luz, sem razão...

São mulheres desgraçadas
Como Agar o foi também,
Que sedentas, alquebradas,
De longe... bem longe vêm...
Trazendo com tíbios passos
Filhos e algemas nos braços,
N'alma lágrimas e fel.
Como Agar sofrendo tanto
Que nem o leite do pranto
Têm que dar para Ismael...

Lá nas areias infindas,
Das palmeiras no país,
Nasceram crianças lindas,
Viveram moças gentis...
Passa um dia a caravana
Quando a virgem na cabana
Cisma das noites nos véus...
...Adeus! ó choça do monte!...
...Adeus! palmeiras da fonte!...
...Adeus! amores... adeus!...

Senhor Deus dos desgraçados!
Dizei-me vós, Senhor Deus!
Se eu deliro... ou se é verdade

Tanto horror perante os céus...
Ó mar, por que não apagas
Co'a esponja de tuas vagas
De teu manto este borrão?
Astros! noite! tempestades!
Rolai das imensidades!
Varrei os mares, tufão!...

E existe um povo que a bandeira empresta
P'ra cobrir tanta infâmia e cobardia!...
E deixa-a transformar-se nessa festa
Em manto impuro de bacante fria!...
Meu Deus! meu Deus! mas que bandeira é esta,
Que impudente na gávea tripudia?!...
Silêncio!... Musa! chora, chora tanto
Que o pavilhão se lave no seu pranto...

Auriverde pendão de minha terra,
Que a brisa do Brasil beija e balança,
Estandarte que a luz do sol encerra,
E as promessas divinas da esperança...
Tu, que da liberdade após a guerra,
Foste hasteado dos heróis na lança,
Antes te houvessem roto na batalha,
Que servires a um povo de mortalha!...

Fatalidade atroz que a mente esmaga!
Extingue nesta hora o brigue imundo
O trilho que Colombo abriu na vaga,
Como um íris no pélago profundo!...
...Mas é infâmia demais...
Da etérea plaga
Levantai-vos, heróis do Novo Mundo...
Andrada! arranca este pendão dos ares!
Colombo! fecha a porta de teus mares!'

Castro Alves - O Navio Negreiro

(uma das coisas mais lindas que já li na vida)

'Sperai!
Caí no areal e na hora adversa
Que Deus concede aos seus
Para o intervalo em que esteja a alma imersa
Em sonhos que são Deus.

Que importa o areal e a morte e a desventura
Se com Deus me guardei?
É O que eu me sonhei que eterno dura
É Esse que regressarei.'


Fernando Pessoa, Mensagem

Pag. 265

"O senhor está certo de que contavam com ela?" — "Ah! não sei."
O sr. de Charlus obedecia assim, talvez sem querer, àquela senha universal de não fornecermos informações aos ciumentos, seja para nos mostrarmos absurdamente "camaradas", por ponto de honra, ainda que detestando-a, em relação à pessoa que é objeto de ciúme, seja por maldade para com ela, pressentindo que o ciúme faria redobrar o amor, seja por aquela necessidade de sermos desagrádaveis aos outros que consiste em dizer a verdade à maioria dos homens, mas aos ciumentos escondê-la, porque a ignorância lhes aumenta o suplício, pelo menos é o que imaginamos, e para afligirmos os outros nos guiamo-nos pelo que nós mesmos julgamos, talvez erradamente, mais doloroso."

"How great is Your good stored up for those who fear You,"

Ps 31:19

"I love you, I love you, I looove you.

That's all I want to say.
Until I find a way
I will say the only words I know that
You'll understand.

I want you, I want you, I waaant you.

I think you know by now
I'll get to you somehow.
Until I do I'm telling you so
You'll understand."

Observation Drawings - 10, 15 & 20 seconds

Gratitude

"i never saw a wild thing feel sorry for [herself]– don't let this world tame your heart. Be a hunter and not the hunted"

Thoughts

1. The inner dialogue particular to each person is wrapped around the soul and it whispers timelessly - it has always been there and ever will. That's why the same actions could be done by different individuals and they should affect differently, it feels true to the extent they are similar of the story told inside that person, which is unique and undeclared. The heart is sheltered inside and it never changes, whereas the clothing is vulnerable to either good or bad.
Sometimes the obvious and simple can be so bright and genius, and it could also be expected and boring; they are both easy and difficult in opposite ways. It depends on how is the conversation between the means the person used to make that happen and what his or her soul is asking for.

sunset today

42

"A ruler born. It is the hidden strength of superiority: never the issue of pomposity, but that of a natural imperiousness. All become subject to it without knowing why, recognizing in it the hidden power of born authority. These sovereign spirits are kings by merit, and lions by innate right, who capture the hearts, and even the minds of all about them, through the faith they inspire: when blessed with other gifts, they are born to be the prime movers of mankind, for they can accomplish more with one word, than others with a thousand."

-Baltasar Gracian, 1653

"The devil's greatest deception is to convince us that he does not exist"

-Charles Baudelaire

As If By Magic

"Submerging from your world
And back into my bliss
A day rolled into one
Is burning on my lips
Blurring all your words
Until they don't exist
And in a parallel universe
It's me you can't resist

And although
You're the only home I'll ever know
As if by Magic
Thoughts of you are gone"

Seating On a Bench

this is genius:

Heart Weather

Pg. 285

"Desejos há que, circunscritos às vezes à boca, uma vez que os deixamos tomar corpo, exigem ser satisfeitos, quaisquer que sejam as consequências; não se pode resistir à tentação de beijar um ombro decotado que se esteve olhando mais demoradamente do que convinha e sobre o qual os lábios caem como a serpente sobre o passarinho, de abocanhar um doce com dentes fascinados pela fome, de renunciar ao espanto, ao desassossego, à aflição ou à alegria que se vai provocar numa alma com palavras imprevistas"

M.P.

Superfície de Exposição

As palavras estao tão repetitivas e os adjetivos tão cansados... cada vez mais raro é reinventar o novo e não se tornar chato. Ele sabe fazer isso como se fosse próprio; admiro. Os pensamentos mais puros me vem quando estou deitada de olhos fechados. Nao me importo mais com as palavras dificeis, as ideas parecem apenas que abrem a porta da infinita fonte criativa, até entao trancada no escuro. Assim confortável, a cama é nuvem densa me envolvendo solta no ar. Estou me descrobindo, ação e preguiça - é volumoso, descama verdades que nao voltam, é doloroso, mas é aquela dor gostosa. Já pensou naquelas ideias incriveis que ja deixamos escapar da memória? Tudo fica tao vago, pra onde os pensamentos vão? será que eles se dissolvem como a água? Por que se juntam mas se vão. Esses dias tenho estado mais ciente de mim, parece que mudei... nunca mais tive aquele medo de não saber quem eu era. Você me perguntou quais eram meus medos e covardemente respondi que eles estavam desaparecendo. Estão mesmo, mas ainda tenho muitos medos, fiquei com medo de contar pra você. Agora eu penso se você acreditou no que eu disse aquela hora... eu sou muito mais fraca no que te digo e muito mais forte no que você não sabe, acho q você também. SInto uma falta de identidadde material e de limites, aonde estao meus braços, esqueci de olhar nos meus olhos, como será que estou? Mudei de plano, fui reconfigurada, estou mais leve, menos eu. nao me lembro da transicao. Quando será que voce vai dizer que me ama? Gostei da voz confissional madura que aquela menina receitou seu diário de poema indiscreto. Eu agora já sou um pouco dela. Preciso concluir as estruturas, fechar com o telhado e dar a volta.

"Definir É Limitar"

O dia em que se descobre eterna paixão por Oscar Wilde não é qualquer dia. Hoje foi o meu.

"O mistério do amor é mais profundo que o mistério da morte."

- Oscar Wilde

Caetano É Kitsch

Assitir Caetano Veloso ao vivo é embarcar numa viagem sinestética, do mais apurado ao mais escrachado, referência perdida no tempo; meu baiano amado está em todas. Visualize: um homem grisalho cantando palavras que tocam a alma, fazendo movimentos de dançarina espanhola e vestindo uma pólo lilás - mas que sutíl combinação!
Adoro como ele usa palavras bregas e elementos fora de contexto nas letras e no show. Adoro que ele ainda faz música nova - (ainda) fala de sexo em quase todas - polemiza, incomoda, dança, pula, omite e assume - tarado, viado, macho e apaixonado.
Um gênio inadecuado e cômodo, consumido indiscriminadamente por todos.
Meu cantor brasileiro preferido, ainda diz ter dúvidas sobre seu talento como músico - pra mim essa insegurança é sua maior força; a palavra mágica.

Caetano é kitsch, Caetano é foda.

Mais verdades, Caetano! Obrigada.

"After of all of the darkness and sadness
Soon comes happiness
If I surround my self with positive things
I'll gain prosperity"

- Beyonce

Music Improvisation Party II

Lets Go to The Park and Dance With Strangers
Come On

Click To Play

drums: Oli bass: Nahana Schelling guitar: Winslow the Third vocals: Diana Motta

Music Improvisation Party I

Coisas Erradas

Click To Play

drums: Oli bass: Nahana Schelling guitar: Winslow the Third vocals: Diana Motta

[Vita Nuova, chapter 3]

"A ciascun’alma presa, e gentil core,
nel cui cospetto ven lo dir presente,
in ciò che mi rescrivan suo parvente
salute in lor segnor, cioè Amore.
Già eran quasi che atterzate l’ore
del tempo che onne stella n’è lucente,
quando m’apparve Amor subitamente
cui essenza membrar mi dà orrore.
Allegro mi sembrava Amor tenendo
meo core in mano, e ne le braccia avea
madonna involta in un drappo dormendo.
Poi la svegliava, e d’esto core ardendo
lei paventosa umilmente pascea:
appresso gir lo ne vedea piangendo."

- Dante Alighieri


I write this piece of poetry for any soul taken by love and any noble heart,
so that they may write me back their opinion about it. I greets our lord, that is Love.
Love itself appeared suddenly to me when one third of the night had already passed.
If I think back about it I’m frightened.
Love seemed cheerful while bringing in its arms a sleeping woman wrapped in a cloth and in its hands my heart.
Love then woke her up and she ate this burning heart; it then went away crying.

Lá

The Unimaginable Perfection Of Bestow

Meu amor,
Eu sei que voce não me entende muitas vezes... mas eu também não entendo muitas coisas, e acho bom, sabe por que?

A verdade é sempre ao contrário.
De modo que para ser Ela é preciso estar fora dela.
A realidade é impossível, entendeu?
É simples mas é difícil...
Não se deve entender na verdade.

O último e o primeiro juntos formam o infinito.
Por isso Ela não pára nem em um nem em outro.
Entendeu?
Vezes não, vezes sim; assim há de ser, sim.
Quero ver o que pode ser mais perfeito que isso.

Meu amor,
Quero ver o que pode ser mais perfeito que isso.
"Vezes sim, vezes nao; assim há de ser, sim."
Eu sei que voce não me entende muitas vezes...
Entendeu?
Mas eu também não entendo muitas coisas, e acho bom, sabe por que?

Ela não pára nem em um nem em outro,
A verdade é sempre ao contrário.
O último e o primeiro juntos formam o infinito.

De modo que para ser Ela é preciso estar fora dela.
Não se deve entender na verdade.
A realidade é impossível, entendeu?
É difícil mas é simples.

A verdade é sempre ao contrário.
Quero ver o que pode ser mais perfeito que isso.

Meu amor,

Extraviado

Meu amor fugiu de casa.
Meu amor desgarrado,
meu amor partido,
meu amor sem dono.
Quero meu amor devolta,
vivo ou morto.

II

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Caminhava rumo ao alvo à saltos mirados, a coreografia das mãos falantes, sólidas curvas de dedos famintos, dançava ao som das flautas de ouro.
O número próprio, a poça na rua, a pele do bicho, a surpresa sagrada, os encantos da sorte, a palavra de risco -
pelo jeito discreto de sorrir uma ponta dos lábios firmes em concenso, deslizando discreta felicidade.
Os olhos se estendiam e flutuavam no branco saltando realidade, me entendiam ao fundo: viemos de muito perto há um tempo esquecido atrás.
Um conforto ingênuo de coração indefeso, a vulnerabilidade, a proximidade cálida das peles, acanhado suspiro, o cheiro, a paixão.
E quanto a mais conheco mais abandono a razão e o espaço, com inevitável avidez, te redescobir para esquecer denovo.
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De-me certeza,
e não reclamarei mais da vida sofrida, nao me importa mais os egoistas e os coitados. Eu tenho a certeza do meu amor, que é infinito, e não dependo da sua resposta para prova-lo, ele me volta de todos os outros lados.
Deus me proteja da minha obsessão compulsiva que cega a razao, dos meus vícios, pensamentos ruins e do coracao que duvida. Eu posso gritar tao alto e quebrar os vidros da janela, de desespero apaixonado e quase falta de esperança; aguardo a sua chegada. Deus me proteja dos aproveitadores, de quem só suga minha energia, da falta de respeito e carinho. Me de paciencia para esperas intermináveis que me devoram e a liberdade para o ciumes inseguro. Deus ilumine a face dos meus inimigos, deixe-me esquecer de mim para viver nos outros. Me de forcas para ver o bem em quem me fez mal, ilumine minhas escolhas e me faca saber que eu só me basto. A dependência afetiva é escravidao, encoraje minha igenuidade e liberte minhas correntes do chao. Caia sobre mim como chuva inesperada e lave minhas dúvidas, para assim compartilhar a alegria com meus irmaos. Deixe me ser a causa, cheguei no estado ultimo e humilhado da condição humana. Não sou nada sem você, preciso da sua ajuda.

Olhos Bastos

Sob o vício azul de ondas escuras, lã macia e tóxica, avanço em alto mar.
Atravesso recifes de mel e cristais polidamente corretos de si.
A pérola encrustada no fundo da caverna brilha à luz rara do calor e curva-se frágil ao sol;
Me engole como planta carnívora.
Sob o invólucro semi esférico roxo de pálpebras gulosas;
Seus olhos seguram o mundo.

Click to play

Condition: Act Beyond Nature

Click to play

a short movie by Diana Motta
under the Lumiere Principles:

-60 seconds max.
-Fixed camera
-No audio
-No zoom
-No edit
-No effect

Unfinished Portrait #5

Oil on Canvas - July 2009



by Diana Motta

Have Me Back Into Your Womb

The sky colors as my love grows,
Watch the warm embrace light goes,
The winds soothe for my heart blows.
Keep me fresh in the good news,

You've never been so beautiful.
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